My birthday was this week. I turned 22.
For most people, they won’t think that’s old. Some people turning 22 would probably be beyond excited.
But me? I’m feeling… not excited. I’ve been feeling depressed for some time now. I believe it was about the time school started that I began feeling this way. There’s a lot of stress hanging over me, classes, club, work, and doctors’ appointments. Speaking of, my new doctor kind of has me worried about something I’d never really considered a problem. And if it is, I don’t know what I’ll do with myself.
The classes I’m taking this semester are not hard. Pretty breezy honestly. However, right now I’m taking three, but after spring break, it’ll be four classes. I don’t think it will be too hard, but thinking about it stresses me out.
The club is great. We just got new members and they’re awesome. It’s pretty cool to see us growing and expanding like this. Very excited to see what we do this semester.
Work isn’t a problem either. I work 3-4 days a week, which is enough to handle, and it gives me the money I need to survive. Not really anything more to say about that.
It sounds like I’m not as stressed as I feel. Class, club, and work aren’t that stressful. Besides not really vibing with what I’m doing for work, things are alright. But inside, that’s where all the stress is. The depression and the anxiety are kind of fighting for who is going to be in charge, and I think the depression might be winning. I spent today lying in bed instead of going to Starbucks to write, like I kept telling myself I wanted.
And I do want to. But I also don’t want to leave the house.
So anyway, my birthday was this week. On Thursday some of my family came over to celebrate and my parents bought me a cake, and Jonathan and I made dinner. It was one of the best days I’ve had in such a long time.
Okay, I don’t think I have much more to share. I’m changing uploading days to Friday (ignore that today is Saturday) because it’s the one day I usually have all to myself.